It's sheer lunacy that a parent of a sick child in the midst of appointments and scheduling for treatment for cancer has to decide whether to go to work and maintain financial stability or to be by their child's side while they are going through all these proceedures. Yet thats exactly the choice I have to make. Guilt does not even begin to cover it and the only saving grace in all this is that the hospital where he is seeing doctors and getting tested is up the street from where my hospital is(where I work).
However it is not like I can sit and hang out with him while he is getting all this done. I have to keep running back and forth because I am still on the clock and I can't afford to take any more days off. Since I am a new employee(less than a year) I have no time to take off and I can't keep taking off anyway because the spectre looms large when they go to review my time here and see so many days spent out. The flip side of all this is that If i said the hell with all that and stayed with my son(which is where my instincts want me to be) then i would lose my job, be unable to pay my bills, and be out on the street.
Isn't this lovely...
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